i followed suit and laid out on my back....imagine that

blah.

no really, blah.

that's really about the extent of my emotions these days.

i feel like i'm just rolling through life, not even running or just walking but rolling. every little bump that comes along it forces me in a different direction. one long/endless roll that makes me dizzy. as my head is spinning i feel that i need to make the big decisions in my life.

i know i'm only 20, but i feel like now is the time i need to stand up and start walking. quit rolling and take lead in my life. instead of bumps and obstacles pushing me in the other direction i'll walk over them.

i'm going back to school. it only took me a year to figure out that is the next move in my life. i wish i would have taken that year right out of high school instead of wasting 1 1/2 years of money and time.

marketing.

wanted to do it since high school, it's the only thing that has been a constant in the back of my head. sure i won't make a difference in anyones life or make a lot of money, but i feel like i'll enjoy it.

that's what i need right now is to enjoy the things i do. i've been so depressed since high school more or less. i don't know if it's more or less depressed as it is repressed. i don't know. i feel like i've grown up but at the same time i haven't.

i try to pretend that it's easy for me to meet new people. but it's not. i'm comfortable with the people i have in my life right now, but i know i need to get out and meet people. i also need to patch some old friendships and relationships that i dearly miss.

i need to find a new job. i'm finally over the whole engineering/cadd thing. i hated it and couldn't be happier with my decision.

i feel like i'm home now, like i'm coming around from a trip. not an actual trip, but more of a metaphorical trip. it was nice, but it's even better to be home.

my sister is "officially" engaged. whoo hoo. cheer. blah blah blah.
-i guess it's not as exciting since she's been living with the guy for a year now.
-i like Rob a lot, he's a good guy. like the brother i never had.

i have potentially torn ligaments in my ankle, i found out for sure this week. hopefully i don't need surgery.

i'm looking forward to winter, i don't want, i NEED to start skiing again. hopefully i can with this whole ankle thing.

i hope the best for everyone. give me a hint if you read this, i just want to know who my audience is.

peace and love.

-aaron